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3 Apr 2008

Post number 35: still sadly in Putney

It’s a bit disappointing to still be at Putney and be writing this but I can assure you there’s a good reason, unfortunately it’s a bit of a sad one. You know how the physiotherapists comment had rather devastated me well yesterday the physio and Sonja formally took me to one side and told me that I was unlikely to ever walk normally again, even walking short distances independently with a stick was unlikely, to add insult to injury the doctor also told me that the reason I’ve lost a small circle of hair near my right temple is Alopechia (stress related hair loss and the thing that made Gail Porter go bald) and to cap it all off, my reflexologist told me that my feet smelt (for the first time since she’s been treating me). So to sum up, yesterday was about as bad as it gets. I didn’t sleep at all well last night, so I am a broken man today, not exactly sure how life could get much worse. My first instinct is to stick two fingers up at them because medical science knows as much about neurology as I do, I don’t care how much brain damage the physio tells me I have, and how hard walking will be without certain areas of the brain to automatically control the muscles that help me to balance, it’s all mumbo-jumbo to me, what worries me is that the staff here will always hand over to any future physio that deals with me not to bother with walking because it’s a ‘lost cause’. I just feel like an utter failure today. To make matters worse the situation with my house is looking much worse. Nothing seems to be ready, flatmates haven’t been finalised yet, there haven’t been any carers organised yet because there was a misunderstanding by the social services, what do I have to do for something to go my way?!

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