6 Sep 2009

Post 153: Some Comedy

To my shame I haven't made a decision on this week's mixed metaphor so I thought I'd go with a hilarious titbit I found uttered by futuramas idiot egotistical starship captain Zap Branigan
'Once we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes will fall like a house of cards. Checkmate." , which made me almost fall out of my chair!I didn't have time to post this yesterday because I spent most of the day writing it and I didn't have the requisite couple of hours I need to post it because I was off to the Proms with Steve and Naomi last night to see some 18th Century god-bothering music or Handels
Messiah as it's more commonly known. It was good and most importantly Steve and Naomi loved it, it was my leaving present to them. I have always enjoyed their company – Steve's forthright take on life has always amused me and being keen to do things makes them good companions, it is infectious. From the moment we arrived at the Albert Hall, Steve was already waxing lyrical about the Architecture of the hall, which is incredible
. Naomi, a bit of a chorister was anticipating hearing the Messiah, describing it as 'advanced'. I think I can safely say we all enjoyed it and I only had to be nudged awake once!
OK, my original post:
I am desperate to go and see some stand up comedy as it picks me up and with any luck seeing young Welsh accented Genius Mark Watson
again will do the trick, for it is Saturday lunchtime now and my lovely cousin Julie has dropped in with Lunch but I must confess to being in the emotional doldrums as my last post will atest. I spend all my time and scant energy looking for events to go to and meticulously organising them (ie who's going, who's driving, getting tickets etc...) but do people really want to go is my question. Often it feels as though I am asking people a huge favour just to go, surely it should be the other way around? After all I'm doing the organising and getting the tickets and it seems when people change their mind and decide not to go they singularly don't appreciate the stress that has been gone through, sure, taking me out is not the path of least resistance but it is I judge a better night than staying in. I only write this because I've had a couple of lastminute let-downs and when you're as dependent on others as I am it's a disaster.
So, it's Sunday [monday]now and last nights comedy picked me up indeed. Firstly special thanks are due to Karen and Toby for being able to drive me after I phoned them in a panic on friday, words cannot express the gratitude I feel to them taking me, especially to Karen for putting up with my rant about how rubbish everything is on the long drive through London traffic. I also want to say how much of a pleasure it was taking my other friends to this event. I have now been to 'Live at the Chapel' three times,it is a monthly comedy event put on in a massive church in Islington,

and it has proved to be a rather eclectic event. I always go to see the headline act which thus far has never disappointed and I feel my comic taste has been vindicated, the same can sadly not be said for the support acts, when I took Tony and Kate to go and see Simon Amstell at the beginning of August Tony told me that two of the support acts were among the worst he'd seen and I'd go with that. Tony didn't say anything last night but the support acts were a bit ropey. Firstly though the compere was an excellent Northern Bloke called Alun Cochrane
who told us that the job of the Compere is to be 'energetic and zesty' neither of which he did, so he told us, instead he just did 'funny,dour northern bastad' which worked very well, he may not be as good at it as Daniel Kitson
but nobody is.
At this stage I just want to say how great it was to see my best mate Tony and his lovely girlfriend Kate, it always makes me happy to see my friends happy and to try and return the many favours he has given me since I have known him, it was also a lovely surprise to see my old university housemate Alex and her husband Will who happened to have decided that 'live at the chapel' looked good. Fellow comedy appreciators are very good news indeed! And finally my old schoolmate Mr Jon Bond who I am shamelessly trying to setup with my gorgeous psychologist Vicki,
I wish I'd been a fly on the wall at that photoshoot! My grumpiness is no reason for my friends not to have a little joy and as soon as Jon had picked his jaw up off the floor they seemed to get on famously! The rest of the show was enjoyable if not spectacular, it'll stick in my mind as a 'good' if not 'outstanding' evening largely because the support acts were a bit hit and miss. First up was Phil Kay,
a madcap scot who I have seen on the excellent QI
a few times, his stand-up persona is clearly very different from his panel show Persona because clearly trying to emulate a hyperactive child on Tartrazine he started babbling about 'because this is a house of god, you're not allowed to drink alcohol, except in the back' before producing a bottle of beer then saying ' I bet you're not allowed a beer enema' before mooning the crowd and wedging the bottle of beer where the sun don't shine. Rather than laugh you could feel the shared emotion 'No need' Go around the room. Comedians often seem to exhibit this sort of schizophrenia and bizarre behaviour depending on the occasion or what drug they're on. The 2nd act was introduced as Lorretta Maine,
an American, deep southern, man hating, vegan, psychopathic Musician. At this point I was bemoaning to my friends the absence of British Comedienne Pippa Evans who I'd seen and rated in a largely improvised show last year. I have just discovered that Loretta Maine is one of Pippa Evans characters which shows how on the ball I am. The combination of lousy eyesight and the fact that she was introduced as being 'all the way from America are exhibits A and B for the defence. Anyway, being a meat eating non psycho English man I didn't really like Loretta especially as I couldn't really hear the words clearly enough although I did catch the bit about her hiding in her ex boyfriends cupboard and jumping out and murdering him and his new girlfriend by shooting them both in the head, I must have had a sense of humour failure because I found this about as tasteful as Phil Kays beer enema. Then after Loretta I think everyone breathed a collective sigh of relief and the laughter continued/started with the excellent Lee Mack,
a man I see on TV all the time, whether it be hosting 'Live at the Apollo'
or as a team captain on the always entertaining 'Would I lie to you'.
Mack was the secret guest, so secret that even I knew. He made way for the man we'd come to see, Welsh accented motormouth Mark Watson. Now I say Welsh accented because apparently he only pretends to be Welsh. I think I've somehow managed to get over this disingenuity by not caring. Accentt aside, he seems to be a genuine guy who'd just make you laugh, he'd certainly never physically intimidate anyone because he's so slight that you feel the slightest gust of wind might blow him away, as usual he was excellent.
The joke from Mack that really stuck was 'How come Marmalade isn't just called orange jam? It's made in exactly the same way. Of course fountain of all knowledge Steve answered this last night, apparently Marie Antoinettes nursemaid used to make it for her when she was ill, marie malade, fine, doesn't quite seem so funny now although I thought his observation 'how stupid do you have to be to buy a DFS sofa at full price?'. Was right on the money


Stevie said...

Thanks for a great night on Sunday mate, just thought I'd publicly denounce myself and point out that I may be incorrect on the 'marmalade' story, looks like I had bought into an urban myth there...

Klein’s Comprehensive Etymological Dictionary of the English Language. There is no truth whatsoever to the folk etymology which states that the word derives from "Marie malade" (French for "ill Mary"), referring to Mary, Queen of Scots because she used it as a medicine for a headache or upset stomach, or that during a bout of seasickness on a sailing from France to Scotland, she turned to the sugary substance made of quinces by her French chef in order to ease her queasiness, is repeated in popular food history as a folk etymology for "marmalade", as if from Marie malade, a story which is also sometimes attributed to Marie Antoinette.

I stand corrected, by myself!


Dom P said...

It's the siren for you! It's what you get from acquiring your knowledge from overheard conversations in pubs! Hehe.

Stevie said...

Indeed, an Alan Davies-worthy slip on my part!



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